- He is an avid Miami sports fan.
- He talks on the radio about sports (Shout-out EK)
- His favorite athletes are Tim Tebow and Brian Scalabrine.
- He has a borderline (probably more than borderline) obsession with Taylor Swift.
- His social life consists mainly of sitting alone in his condo watching Netflix™
- He's got so much wood, he could build him a fort.
- He was rumored to affiliate with members of "The Unit". (confirmed)
- As of January 19th, 2018, Brendan has an estimated total of 69.420 Thiccness™.
- He has a Doctorate in Culinary Tide Pod™ Arts.
- He had a helluva dog. R.I.P Cozmo.
- He was a Captain of the JV football team.
- But a lowkey Benchwarmer on the Varsity Team.
- Alright fine it was highkey.
- He had 7 total TDs in his football career.
- His eyebrows are on fleek 96.3% of the time.
- His record Whip/Nae-Nae time is 2 minutes, 43 seconds.
- Although he cannot "JuJu on that Beat", he can, in fact, "Cabbage Patch on that Periodicity"
- He has a surprising affinity for shoulder length hair.
- He doesn't understand Betty White.
- He single-handedly freed Gucci Mane.
- BDC. That's the Motto.
- President Trump recognized Brendan's Harambe eulogy as "huge" and "emotionally moving".
- His alias is Octavius Rex a.k.a Mr. Long, Tan, and Handsome.
- He's the man your man should smell like (with Old Spice®).
- بريندان هو السيد سرقة فتاتك.
- He's never gonna give you up.
- He's never gonna let you down.
- He's never gonna run around and desert you.
- Are you still actually reading this right now
- This is so pointless
- Wow
- Seriously though
- You could be doing so much more with your life; instead, you're reading "Brendan Schaefer Trivia"
- Who does that
- A smart person, that's who
- I applaud your time-wasting
- I appreciate your intelligence
- And boredom
- Brendan blesses you
- B is love
- B is life
- Yeet
- ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)